Monday, April 16, 2012

Mirror, Mirror - The Weakness of Overconfidence

I remember having a good chuckle when I read the original story which featured what I perceived to be an overconfident, self centered egomaniac.  Those of you who know me know I laughed, I laughed a lot.  The woman's tale made it clear why she was having trouble building healthy female relationships - she suffered from narcissistic entitlement syndrome her charming personality was getting in the way.  After reading the article I felt sorry for her not for the reasons she intended, but because the last thing I wanted was to be her friend.  In the spirit of not judging, I kept it to myself,  but this article by Christina Patterson, who I would love to be friends with, brings up some valid points regarding confidence, or maybe excess thereof. I do believe that confidence can help you accomplish goals, but you better have something to back it up with, and even then, you should be delicate in its delivery - nobody likes a showoff.  

This line in the narrative rings true: "If you want people to like you, and if you want to shine at what you do, then what you need isn't confidence, but doubt. You need to know, if you want to make friends, that you aren't more special than anyone else. And you need to know that to do something well, you need to be constantly trying to do it better."

So no - fear and doubt are not roadblocks; they're a fork in the road.  You can let them take over and become stagnant , or overcome them with courage - not blind confidence.

Scott Adams's Dilbert 8/21/97

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

So You Had a Bad Day and Other Crimes Against the Fragile

I just heard "Bad Day" on the radio and suddenly I wanted to cry.  Like really, REALLY cry.  The urge was there, waiting right behind my eyeballs with its shaky metaphorical hand ready to turn the faucet. Luckily, my spider senses kicked in (yeah, I have those) and helped me realize what was happening.  I started laughing at the absurdity of the whole situation.  It was a good laugh; the kind where you have to wipe that one tear that escaped from your right eye when it's over.

While I had a rough day indeed, it's common knowledge that the human race was desensitized to the effects of Daniel Powter's pout after its 6 billion plays on American Idol.  After coming to the conclusion that it could be worse (I could have been subjected to Adele's sappy "Someone Like You"(^O^☆♪  or James Blunt's "You're Beautiful" instead), I felt much better and nearly forgot why I was stressed in the first place.  I had somehow succeeded in distracting myself - like a "look over there" moment.  Those of you with toddlers know precisely what I'm talking about.

Try laughing at yourself once in a while - it helps you detach and put things into perspective.

 Laughing at yourself may also inspire you to blog and ignore your laundry pile.