I remember having a good chuckle when I read the original story which featured what I perceived to be an overconfident, self centered egomaniac. Those of you who know me know I laughed, I laughed a lot. The woman's tale made it clear why she was having trouble building healthy female relationships -
she suffered from narcissistic entitlement syndrome her charming personality was getting in the way. After reading the article I felt sorry for her not for the reasons she intended, but because the last thing I wanted was to be her friend. In the spirit of not judging, I kept it to myself, but this article by Christina Patterson, who I would love to be friends with, brings up some valid points regarding confidence, or maybe excess thereof. I do believe that confidence can help you accomplish goals, but you better have something to back it up with, and even then, you should be delicate in its delivery - nobody likes a showoff.
This line in the narrative rings true: "If you want people to like you, and if you want to shine at what you do, then what you need isn't confidence, but doubt. You need to know, if you want to make friends, that you aren't more special than anyone else. And you need to know that to do something well, you need to be constantly trying to do it better."
So no - fear and doubt are not roadblocks; they're a fork in the road. You can let them take over and become stagnant , or overcome them with courage - not blind confidence.
|Scott Adams's Dilbert 8/21/97|